So, my friend Bee and I are starting the first Feminist sorority in the country, and things are taking off a lot faster than I’d ever thought possible. We started it around certain ideas we both believed in, and that I think we still both believe in; but I’m worried about getting so caught up in trying to get members, or trying to get people interested without pissing them off that we completely abandon those principles we started the group with.

One of those is the idea that men cannot be feminists. Feminist-allies is what I prefer to call them. One of the foundational aspects of the group is that only women will hold leadership positions, because there are so many feminist organizations on our campus that are led by men, that are organized by men, that bring in male speakers, that center around men. I don’t want our sorority to become a care-taking organization. I want it to be by women, for women, and about women. And men can help, but they cannot lead. It’s our responsibility to lead our own movement.

This is a lot like the civil rights movement. White people were certainly able to help, to march alongside Blacks, and Browns, but they didn’t (usually) understand the oppression they were fighting as keenly as those they were fighting alongside. They were desperately needed, yes, to fight alongside, to raise awareness, to bring people to the movement, but they were not the movement themselves. Just like men are not the feminist movement, and they can’t be. Because they’re not women.

I just want to figure out how to stick my pole in the concrete and hang on. I don’t want to get whipped around left and right, recanting things because they aren’t universally…politically correct, I suppose. And I don’t understand why I should have to. I know that there are plenty of places where I am wrong, and I think that I am openminded enough that my mind can be changed if that’s the case. I just feel like we’re already buckling under for little to no reason…

It worries me.

I’m going to have a talk with Bee when she gets home tonight, but right now I’m just wondering why we’re giving in so quickly, when there’s absolutely no reason why we have to. We’re not even facing heavy opposition yet. What happens when we do?

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